The Cobras-Chapter 9

When they arrived at Spanky's house his mother was out front watering the plants along the outside of the lawn next to the house in a flower box. She turned and stopped her watering. She was wearing a long brown housecoat and slippers. The car pulled up in the driveway behind his brother Chris' 1969 El Camino. It was a classic "hot rod." It was pearl midnight blue with a sky blue highlight stripe down the side. It was sporting Cragar racing rims and Goodyear racing tires. Chris had spent a lot of money, time and care in taking the old car and making it "cherry." Half of his body was sticking out of the car as he leaned in on his knees to reach the underside of the dashboard. He was displaying a prominent "plummer's crack" as his grey slacks and light blue button up short-sleeve shirt did little do hide his girth from broad daylight. He was the spitting image of Spanky but a little taller and heavier. He was four years older than Ronnie and had already graduated from high school. He was still living at home until he could "save enough money" to move out with one of his buddies.
Spanky and Gator got out of the car as Spanky's mother shouted over to him. "Are we having guests for dinner?" She asked. Gator looked at Spanky and shook his head. "Dude I'm going home for steak tonight." Spanky turned and said, "Yeah Mom, Noah is staying."
"Dude no," Gator said.
"Shut up, you're staying." Spanky said laughing.
"What time do you guys eat," Gator said realizing it was fruitless to argue.
"Usually five-thirty or six." Spanky said as a matter of fact.
"Cool. I'll stay. Then we can go munch some steaks at my house. Cool?" Gator said.
"Cool. Dude I like the way you think sometimes where you are not being a dick." Spanky laughed.
"Fuck you dude." Gator said laughing.
"Fuck you too." Spanky said.
They walked over to where Chris was working on the new stereo system under the dashboard.
"What's up Chris?" Spanky said.
"Nothing. I'm almost done. Hand me that screwdriver over there?" He said as he pointed to a screwdriver on the passenger's seat.
"Gator looked at the interior of the El Camino. It was flawless. It had black leather "diamond tuck" upholstery and vinyl across the dashboard. He had a competition tachometer on the column of the racing style steering wheel and a "Hearst" shifter on the floor. The dark blue carpet matched the outside midnight blue of the two-toned pearl finish perfectly.
"Wow Chris, this thing looks really primo now," Gator said trying not to sound too much like a suck up.
"Thanks man I have been working on it for about a year." Chris said appreciating the genuine compliment.
"This car is a piece of shit Gator. Don't blow smoke up his ass. His car sucks and he knows it. Don't you Chris?" Spanky laughed, clearly trying to agitate his older brother.
"If only I gave a rat's ass what you think I might be offended. Seeing how you drive that sad little bumble bee over there I'll just take pity on you," Chris laughed. "There it's done," he said as he popped up from beneath the dashboard smiling. "Let's take her for a test-drive."
"Cool, let me move my car" Spanky said.
"Don't worry I can get out." Chris said confidently.
Spanky and Gator stared each other down momentarily to see who would get in first. Chris made it simple.
"Ronnie you are in the middle he's got longer legs."
Spanky shook his head and got in first. He hated losing any contest.
"This sucks. Just because he sucks up to you I get to ride bitch." He said laughing.
"Is that a question," Chris asked? "Well in that case you are a bitch so sit in the middle."
Chris maneuvered the large vehicle into a 360 degree turn and then avoided the car in front of him which belonged to his stepfather. It was a brand new Nissan 300ZX that he referred to as his "midlife crisis car." Chris looked out his window as he passed the treasured machine sitting in the driveway. He was only a mere four inches or so away from it but he smoothly passed it and headed down the road. As they drove away from the house Chris looked over at the two young guys riding in his car.  He was four years older than Spanky but they got along about as well as most brothers did. He liked spending time with him and his buddy Gator but only in measured doses. Burning a bowl was usually about the right amount of time.
"So you still got any of that mean green I gave you?" Chris asked as he fumbled with the new stereo.
"You mean the stuff you SOLD me?" Spanky asked?
"At a discount." Chris added.
"Yeah I still got some," Spanky said as he dug into his pocket.
"Well lets get small, " Chris said lauging.
"Microscopic," Spanky added.
"Subatomic," Gator said as he reached into the glove box and found a water pipe. It was dry but would still provide a decent smoke.
Spanky pulled out the baggie and unrolled it. Everyone in the car breathed in deeply through their noses. Spanky held the open baggie up to his nose. "Ahh, smell those purple buds. Mmmmm."
Spanky took a bud and smelled it.
"Mmmm. Sweeter than honey." He said.
Spanky passed the thumbsized bud underneath Gator's nostrils and then under Chris'.
"Do you all approve?" He asked.
"Pack that thing tight," Chris said.
"That's what she said," Spanky laughed.
"No problemo amigo," Gator said as he grabbed a the bud from Spanky and scrunched it down into the bowl.
"He takes Spanish," Spanky laughed.
"Oh yeah, what's her name?"Chris said flatly.
"Fire that shit up," Spanky said handing the base of the pipe to Chris who had just shifted into second gear after making the turn south on the main road. They could cruise in a sraight line for several miles before turning around and coming back. There were rarely cops on this road so it was always a good place to burn a bit of bud if one wanted to do so while cruising.
Chris reached for the bud-filled bowl and put the bong to his lips. Spanky lit the bic lighter and Chris put his thumb on the carburator as he drew in deeply. The clear plastic was a light shade of purple. The chamber filled with smoke and Chris choked briefly as he passed it to Spanky who quickly lit the bowl again and took a huge hit filling the chamber with thick white smoke. He released the carborator and sucked in the smoke. He choked and held it fast, grinning at Gator as he passed it. Gator looked at the bowl as the bong was passed his way.
"Dude its toast! You guys are total bogarts!" Gator laughed.
Spanky and Chris let out their smoke and both started laughing.
Gator reloaded the bowl with another bud Spanky passed him. Gator lit the lighter and watched as the flame entered the freshly packed bowl. He drew in the smoke quickly and lit the cherry on the bowl to a bright orange, then red. He released the carb and breathed in the thick smoke inside the chamber. He choked once, twice, and finally let the whole thing go in a mad coughing frenzy.
"You're a pussy," Spanky said. "Gimmie that." He said as he grabbed the bong from Gator who was still coughing. "Good shit man," Gator managed to say between the thin, shallow coughs.
Spanky finished the bowl. There was just one small hit left after Gator's collossal hit.
Chris gave Gator the universal "roll down your window" signal. The car quickly cleared of smoke. Chris then motioned to roll it back up.
As they approached an intersection Chris braked hard and downshifted. Seeing there were no cars present Chris turned the car sharply to the left and spun the rear end of the car around in a 180 degree circle. He then popped the clutch and the vehicle accellerated quickly and smoothly until Chris chirped through two more gears.
Gator and Spanky were pulled back in their seats by the g-force of the turn and accelleration. They laughed at the sensation.
Chris waved his hand and said," ok gentlemen, behold the power of blaupunkt!" He popped in a cassette and the technopunk sounds of Kraftwerk blasted out of the Bose speakers at a volume intended to make ears bleed. The three all started singing along with the robotic voices.
"We are the robots!" Spanky and Gator started mimicking robot movements.
"You guys are small," Chris laughed.
"We are miniature," Spanky laughed.
"We are microscopic," Gator added laughing so hard that he could barely breathe.
"Microscopic robots, " Chris shouted as they raced past a country road, music blaring all three singing and laughing.
Suddenly, Chris looked in the rearview mirror and saw red lights flashing. It was a Sheriff's Department Patrol car gaining on him at high speed.
"Oh shit its a cop," Chris said as he took his foot off the gas and pulled to the right as he began to slow down.
Spanky reached forward and turned down the radio. Gator quickly lit a cigarette and blew a few drags into the car hoping to mask any lingering smell of the weed. Spanky then took the bong and hid it in an inside pocket that he had for just these kinds of occasions.
"Everyone shut up and let me talk," Chris said with a deadly serious tone. The car came to a stop and the three sat silent waiting to see what would happen next.
The lights of the cruiser came closer, and closer and passed them with lights flashing and the siren blaring.
Everyone in the car breathed a sigh of relief.
"I guess we were too small for him to see us, "Chris said with a straight face. The car erupted in laughter and the car fishtailed briefly as Chris punched the gas. Dust and rocks flew as the vehicle accellerated off of the soft shoulder and onto the road. He hit the second gear sweet spot and the positraction rear end grabbed the road with a chirp. Smooth, burly acceleration from the balanced and blueprinted 350 Chevrolet engine and Corvette transmission pushed everyone back into the vinyl seats.
"Your car sucks, " Spanky said as Chris turned back down their road. He slowed down to nearly an idle and pulled around the Chevy Monza and into "his space."
Everyone got out and Chris waved as he darted into the house.
"He's getting my new stereo dude lets put it into my car," Spanky said.
"Uh ok, " Gator said. "How long will it take?"
"Probably a couple of hours." Spanky said.
Gator looked at his watch. It was already 6pm.
"Dude I am going to hoof it home. Its steak night and I got the killer munchies. Sorry." Gator said as he shrugged his shoulders.
"You're a dick, help me with the radio." Spanky said.
"You and Chris will put it in and I'll be standing around pissed because I missed out on steak." Gator said.
"Yeah go home you pussy I'll come get you when the work is done." Spanky laughed.
"Cool." Gator said.
"Later Gator." Spanky said.
"Later Spanky." Gator said.
"Dick." Spanky said.
Gator waved his hand as he walked out of the driveway. He knew he had to make it home in about fifteen minutes to eat dinner but he was still pretty stoned from the weed that he had just smoked. He decided to take the long way home instead of his short cut through the pepper field. He walked out to the main road where he could walk on the shoulder and take some time to get his head together before facing his folks. He stopped briefly and put two drops of Visene in each eye. If he timed it right they would be about three maritnis into the evening and would hardly notice he was home.
He loved living with his aunt and uncle. The had an easy truce with him. He knew the rules, "Don't cause any trouble and keep appearances that everything was normal." It was a fair enough proposition and he liked living here but it was far from normal.
Gator had heard of alcoholism before but had never really understood it. He had experienced it with his father and stepmother but he had been too young to really think about it. Now it was real and in his face daily. On any given night he could be ambushed with verbal assaults by one or both of them. Earlier this week he had almost been brought to tears by his aunt's needling while he was at the dinner table. She said he was "eating too fast." She continued to tell him to "slow down" until he finally excused himself and went to his room. Living here was like a roller-coaster ride. They could be totally loving and generous one minute and very hurtful and scary the next. Every night it was like walking on eggshells. One had to tread softly and slowly to feel things out and try to avoid conflict. But it was Friday night and they were both probably in a good mood. He could probably "eat and run" before anything bad happened. It was a tactic he had used very effectively for the past year that he had lived here.
It had been tough during the summer being stuck in the house when things started to deteriorate. He would usually retreat to his room and try not to hear the yelling or slamming doors and the occasional broken glass inadvertantly dropped or thrown across the room.
Once school started he had been able to make friends with some guys with cars, like Spanky and Rosco. That allowed him to get out of the house on weekends before they got too drunk and something would inevitably piss them off. He knew if he stayed too long he would become the subject of all the problems in their lives past and present. Alcohol was a scary thing. Luckily he "only smoked weed and drank a little beer," he thought to himself. He would never become like them.
As he reached his road and started to walk towards the house he noticed the light fading behind the mountains. He looked at the sky and admired the beautiful sunset. Bright red orange and soft grey, blue and a purple hue hung over the mountains to the west. One of the things he liked best here were the sunsets. Almost every night from spring to fall one could see a light show.
Suddenly the wind changed direction and he got a big whiff of why some people refused to live in the country. The smell of three hundred cows defacating in one confined area was more than some could bear. He had gotten used to it for the most part and didn't mind it much.
He turned and looked to the east as the shadows began to fall along the green hills. He loved this time of year because of the color of the hills. From a light brown they had turned  to a rich deep shade of green. The rainy months of January through April made the golden hills of California resemble the glades of Scotland he had seen in books.
As the light grew dimmer he noticed that his buzz was fading and he was ready to face the Spanish Inquisition if necessary. "The steak will be good," he thought as he walked up to the front porch. He could smell the barbeque in the back yard and he said a foxhole prayer as he put his hand on the doorknob. "Please make everything ok tonight." With that he opened the door and went inside.